Friends?

by Tifa

Cloud - So why are we all sitting in this coffe house?

Tifa - Because the author couldn't think of anything else for us to do. And she decided to spoof the show Friends.

Cait-Yeah - At least she could have written a way out of here. From the looks of it there is none

Yuffie - This sucks. I want to get out of here and get some more Materia.

Vincent - Good luck.

Red XIII - Don't you mean steal?

Yuffie - Oh Shut up.

Barrett - Come on. We've got to escape and track down Sephiroth.

Cid - How bright guy. You heard Cait. There's no way out.

Barrett - I don't care. I'm gettin out of here.

Aeris - Let us know the minute you succeed.

Cloud - Aeris! You're alive!

Aeris - I sure am. The author decided to bring me back for this story.

Tifa - But that's not fair. I thought the author liked me best. She even named her web page after me, Vincent and my bar.

Aeris - I guess not.

Tifa - See if I say anything nice about her again.

{(poof)}

Cloud - Tifa. Where'd you go?

Aeris - She insulted the author and was erased from the story.

Yuffie - Lucky stiff.

Cloud - No. It's not the same without Tifa.

Aeris - You've still got me Cloud.

Sephiroth - Not for long however.

Cloud - This is getting worse by the minute. First we loose Tifa. Then Sephiroth shows up. What could happen next?

Hojo - What am I doing here?

Cloud - I had to open my big mouth.

Elena - Here are the cups of coffee you ordered.

Barrett - Well,I couldn't find a way out of here nohow. Say why are Hojo and Sephiroth here?

Red XIII - It's all Cloud's fault.

Cloud - Hey. I'll admit Hojo being here was my fault. But the author of this insane story brought Sephiroth here.

{(poof)}

Aeris - No. Now Cloud's gone.

Elena - Is anyone going to drink the coffee I made?

Yuffie - Not unless we have a death wish.

Elena - But I spent hours just making it!

Sephiroth - I'll have one.

Barrett - Well we won't haf ta worry about killin Sephiroth now.

Cait Sith - That's for sure. The minute he drinks that he's a goner.

Elena - Hey. My coffee's not that bad.

Cid - Are you crazy. It's green for gods sake.

Sephiroth - Ack. Gag. Wheeze.

Barrett - Ya see. It's killin him.

Elena - Well it doesn't seem to be affecting Hojo in any way.

Hojo - Actually it's quite delicious.

Cid - Now we all know how twisted Hojo really is.

Red XIII - God, look at Sephiroth now.

Yuffie - Is he suppose to be twitching that much?

Cid - Look at the way his eyes are bulging.

Barrett - For the first time I actually feel sorry for the guy. That's not the way you expect a war hero to die.

Yuffie - And he was so good looking too.(sniffs)

Vincent - Have you forgotten that he wanted to take over the world and rule it as a god.

Yuffie - I don't care. He was a lot better looking than Cloud was.

Aeris - How can you say that? Cloud's a lot better looking than Sephiroth.

Yuffie - There's no comparing the two. Sephiroth was way better looking than Cloud.

Aeris - That's it. Now you die.

Reno - All right. A cat fight.

Red XIII- Why are you here?

Reno - Don't you know that the Turks stick together?

Aeris - (Stops fighting)That means that Tseng is here?

Tseng - Aeris. (Hearts in eyes)

Aeris - Tseng.

Elena - Grrr.(purposely dumps coffee on Tseng's lap)

Tseng - AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!

Elena - I guess I showed you. (Walks away)

Aeris - Are you okay?

Tseng - I am because you're here.

Yuffie - God. I think I'm going to be sick.

Aeris - Why? We're not moving.

Yuffie - Stupid airhead.

Tseng - Don't call Aeris an airhead.

Yuffie - Why not? Everyone knows she is one.

Zack - That's for sure.

Aeris - Zack! You're alive too! (Hugs him)

Tseng - GRRRR.

Zack - I'm glad to see you too. (Hugs Aeris)

Vincent - I think I know how we can escape.

Yuffie - You do? How?

Vincent - I'll transform into my Chaos form and break down a wall.

Barrett - Good idea. Go for it.

Vincent - Okay. Here I go. (Changes into Chaos form and destroys wall)

Barrett - Good work Vincent. (Smiles at hole in wall)

(Building suddenly collapses on group)

(Five hours later)

Barrett - Great job Vincent. (looks over at Vincent from his hospital bed)

Vincent - Hey. How was I supposed to know the building we were trapped in was condemmed?

The End



This is a fanfic by Tifa. Most of her fanfics are humorous from what I've read. Email her and let her know what you think!